For many people, the hardest part of starting to date online
is figuring out what to put in their profile. All dating sites offer their
members a profile page, where each member can write about his or herself,
upload a photo (or several) etc. What you write about yourself in the profile
is extremely important: second only to the picture in terms of making other
members aware of who you are and making them want to contact you.
Many people are keen to start searching for and contacting
people as soon as they join a site. As a result, they either leave their
profile blank, or write something quickly before beginning their search. This
is OK if youre just having a look around, but if you are serious about finding
love online, you should take some time and make sure your profile is a good
reflection of who you are. After all, its what makes you stand out from the
rest of the people on the site.
Here are a few points to keep in mind:
Not too long, not too short
Try to write a profile that is detailed enough to tell
people about you, but short enough to leave people wanting more. Writing a full
length essay is a waste of time as most people wouldnt bother reading it all.
If someone did read it through and contacted you, you probably wouldnt have
anything left to talk about!
Be yourself
Its easy to lie when writing a profile, but more difficult
to follow through once you meet someone. If your profile says youre 64 when
youre really 511, your cover will be blown as soon as you turn up for your
date. Also, starting a relationship with a lie is a sure way to get off to a
bad start.
Unfortunately, even people who are honest and well-meaning
sometimes lie unintentionally in their profile, by trying to write it in a way
that they think would make them more attractive to other people. If you want to
attract a likeminded person, you have to be honest about who you are, your
hobbies and interests etc.
Dont be too demanding
Many people use their profiles to list the qualities they
would like their ideal match to have. There is nothing wrong with that, but
make sure you balance this with information about yourself. You dont want to
come across as writing a ransom note.
Too much information
Avoid mentioning past disappointments and bad break-ups in
your profile; this is not what the space is for. Think: do you really want this
to be the first thing people see when they look you up? Dont let yourself be
defined by negative aspects of your personality and bad experiences of the
past.
Make it funny
Using humour is a good way to liven up a profile and give
people a glimpse into your personality. Some of the most successful profiles
are the ones that simply make people laugh. Including a joke you find funny is
good, as long as you make sure you write something about yourself in the profile
as well.
Be original
Anyone can write I have a good sense of humour, but not
anyone could make you laugh. When writing about yourself, dont just use a list
of adjectives. Try to go deeper and give people examples of what you actually
mean. A good way of doing this is starting off with a list of adjectives and
then using each one as a starting point for a few lines of text.
Upload a picture
Even the least shallow people want to know who theyre
talking to. Not having a photo on your profile will make many people ignore you
completely. Some people even specify in their search that they only want to
speak to people whose picture appears on the site. Dont worry about your looks.
Different people have different tastes and not everyone expects to meet a movie
star or a supermodel online. A clear headshot of you smiling is all it takes to
seriously increase the amount of responses you get.
Be consistent
Make sure your profile, your screen name and your picture
all match the impression you want to give. If you are a woman looking for a
serious relationship, calling yourself SexKitten and uploading a semi-nude
picture of yourself, is not likely to attract the kind of man youre looking
for. A man looking for a wife, should probably not use a username that hints
about how good he is in bed.
Remember: your profile is the first (and often last)
impression you will make to potential online matches. Make it count.
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